Double Digits!!

Taylor turned 10 yesterday! It's hard to believe my baby girl is already 10! We had a wonderful weekend. Taylor invited a friend to spend the night Saturday night. Madison came over and we made ice cream sundaes. Here are the girls enjoying their creations!
Then we allowed Taylor to open her gifts, since Sunday would be crazy. She was thrilled about that. The girls stayed up way too late, but had a great time! I kept telling Nate it reminded me so much of my younger years. Oh the crazy times ahead!!
On Sunday, we got up, had a big breakfast then went to church. After church, we headed up to the mall. We had lunch at TGI Fridays, and here Taylor is being sung to and presented her birthday dessert! She enjoyed the ice cream!
And here she is, looking all grown up!
After lunch, we went to the mall and Taylor shopped like crazy! It was a lot of fun. We went to Kids Concoctions and the girls made glitter bath gel and lip gloss. That was fun. On the ride home, all three boys fell asleep. We wore them out! I told Nate he should probably just stay home! Boys can't handle a day at the mall!

The entire day, we kept telling her "10 years ago we were doing ..." she loves to hear about the day she was born, still. And I always remind her she is not 10 until 6:47 PM!!

It was a wonderful day. I am so blessed! I'm sure these next 10 years will be trying, but I pray every day that God will grant me the patience and understanding I need, and that I will be the mother that a beautiful, smart, kind, caring girl like Taylor deserves! God Willing!

God is Good!

Haircuts!

Well, I know haircuts don't usually warrant a blog post, but in this case... I think it does
This is a big deal! Toby has been home for over 8 months. People continue to ask, and do so often, "how is it going?" While I'm excited about peoples interest, I wonder what kind of response they are expecting. I think so many people hear horror stories of the transition. They really are curious about how it is going for us. I never really know what to say. My usual response is "God is Good, and he has answered all of our prayers about Toby's transition". And that is the honest truth.

All of the things we prayed about... things we heard about happening to other people... like dealing with the time change, eating problems, chronic ear infections, sleeping issues (okay maybe that has been an issue!), attachment, etc., have not really been an issue. It has been amazing to see how God could take this little guy, from halfway around the world, and make him such a perfect fit for the Mills' family! From the faces he makes, to his sense of humor, to his eating preferences and personality... He is a Mills!

Back to the haircut...this has still been a transition for him. And over the last few weeks, we have seen amazing progress. The haircut yesterday was not his first. I believe it was his 4th... but... it was his first BY HIMSELF! Up until now, just placing him near the chair he would scream. Yesterday, he couldn't get up there fast enough! He sat there like a champ, the entire time. It nearly brought me to tears.

Another thing has been his attachment with Nate. This has been a slow process, and sometimes a painful one for Nate, I'm sure. But lately, Toby has been going to Nate on his own, with me in the room and climbing up into his arms. It is priceless!

So while things have been going good! And Toby has been doing well.. we continue to see improvements.

God is Good!

Older Adoption Article

Here is a link to a very fascinating article in Readers Digest regarding adoption of older children and attachment disorders.

Reader's Digest Article

While Toby was not in an orphanage, and was not this old when he was brought into our family, attachment is always our primary concern. He has been home eight months now, and I still fear sometimes whether what I have done or said will effect him in a negative way.

There is so much concern about adopting an older child. For us, it was easy to say "we want to keep birth order" so we have to have a younger child. While that is very much true, and the main emotion behind our decisions, those decisions were also made with an extent of fear, based on attachment issues. Was that selfish? Maybe.. maybe not. It would not be fair for us, considering where we are in our lives and the children we have in our home, to have brought a child into our home that would need so much attention... attention we could not have adequately provided. That would not have been fair to the child, or our other children, etc.

I am so thankful that God has equipped people, like the lady in this article, to handle these situations, and be the angels that so many orphans in this world need! Please always be praying for the orphans around the world, especially those over the age of 3, who are much less likely to be adopted.

Would love to hear your thoughts...

God is Good

Bragging on my Hubby

I haven't given an update on Nate for a while, so I thought I would, cause he's had a big couple of weeks.

School continues to go well. He is taking Philosophy right now... UGH! Fortunately, a good friend from church took this at Liberty as well, and passed on her highlighted notes. He has his first test on Friday, which will give him a better idea of how the class will go. He continues to get pull A's and is very excited about that.

Nate preaches again next weekend. It has been a while since he has done this, so please pray as he prepares, with everything else we have going on, that he will speak the words God has for the High School students.

His band continues to rehearse and prepare for an upcoming show at a church in May. They have a name now... and a logo... check it out...

And finally, he got a new ride yesterday! We've been looking, saving, planning, penny pinching since Toby got home. A two door car with three kids, just doesn't work! So he bought a 2005 Jeep Liberty Sport 4X4 (gotta throw the 4X4 in to make sure it's a man ride!)


It's spring break week! So while the weather is not Great, we spent time playing outside yesterday. The kids have been dying to get on the trampoline. And we got a new basketball hoop for Easter (since the storm took ours 2 years ago!) and today, that is what they want to do. I'm hoping the sun comes out and warms things up a little!

God is Good

Easter Celebration

What a beautiful weekend. Of course, we live in Ohio, so the weather could have been better, but celebrating Easter is always beautiful! We went to Communion Friday evening. What a privilege. Part of me wishes we could have Communion more often, but then I wonder if the meaning would get lost. From past experience, I believe it would! Saturday was pretty lazy. We went to Easter service Saturday night. That was weird, and nice! It's been a long time since I went to Saturday services! It was a beautiful service, and the Worship was amazing. I was in tears, reflecting on the first Easter! Pastor Bob brought an amazing message, and the place was packed! What a blessing!

Here are some photos from our Sunday activities. Toby got his first Easter basket. The big bunny brought him a Hanbok for his Build-A-Bear (Dog), some sidewalk chalk and bubbles, a book and some accessories for his Mr. Potato Head, as well as a new toothbrush. He enjoyed the few pieces of chocolate the most and they were gone in no time... who needs breakfast.
Drew was overwhelmed when he realized the Easter Bunny had brought him the Millennium Falcon for his Star Wars Galactic Heroes. He was literally shaking he was so darn excited. Way to go Bunny! He also got bubbles and a book and a new ToothTunes Toothbrush. Now he's rockin' out to Corbin Bleu as he brushes his pearly whites. Does it get any better?
Around noon, after mommy fixed a big yummy breakfast (tootin' my own horn, I know!) we went to Grandma Derri's and Pap's (or as Drew calls him, the Bestest Grandpa Ever). Dad had filled baskets for the kids, and hid the eggs around the yard. It was priceless seeing my dad out there with my children. Words just can't describe the emotion on so many levels. Here he's trying to keep Toby on his feet, as he was running so fast to get the eggs, he kept falling. Take note, don't hide eggs in the pine trees for kids who've never been around pine trees. Toby got quiet a surprise when he tried to reach into the branches for an egg! OUCH!
After my parents, we headed out to Nate's Mom and Step-Dad's for dinner and another Egg hunt. Had to include this photo of the snow pile! It was so darn funny to have Easter eggs hidden in the snow. Here is Toby and "A-wee" (Averie) as they prepare to grab all the eggs they can. Each of the 9 grandkids had 31 Eggs to find... you read that right, we will now have candy until Halloween!
And just to not get into trouble, here is a photo of Taylor as she searches for eggs at Grandma's house. You can see all the eggs just laying on the ground. There are only so many places to hide over 250 eggs!

After the egg hunt, the children listened as Grandma read the resurrection story as the kids participated with the resurrection eggs they found in the hunt. That is always a special time.

He is Alive!
God is Good!

ONE YEAR AGO!!

Well, while our adoption process has taken years, amazingly, it has been a year since we first saw Toby's beautiful face! It was March 19, 2007 when our social worker first sent us an e-mail with details about our beautiful son. It took us a few days to have his file reviewed by a pediatrician (not that I ever had a doubt God was in control). March 22, 2007 was the day that we verbally accepted the referral. What a glorious day. If I'm being honest... I still have the voicemail that our social worker left for us congratulating us! While the wait to bring him home was torture... it's amazing to think that a year has passed since we first saw him.

I was looking at some Easter video from last year, and literally, as Taylor and Drew searched for their baskets, I thought "where's Toby?"... DUH - Korea! But not this year! He will be right behind them.

God is Good!

New Do!!

Well, I had the opportunity yesterday, as an early birthday gift, to get my hair done. I'm ashamed to admit the last time it was done. And yes... I already have plenty of gray! Luckily, my hair is pretty healthy and shiny, and it can be hard to tell their gray unless you look closely! At least that is what I tell myself!

So I go, and tell my hairdresser, whom I've been going to for 15 years, that I'm ready to go a little crazy. We chuckle at the photos of the bleach blondes with hot pink highlights... okay not that crazy, I can hear the other PTO and Soccer moms now! We settle on a pretty natural color with a few "brighter" (Okay... red) highlights around the face. I'm very pleased with it.

I tell Jody, I want to go a little crazier with the cut, which makes her very happy (what is it with hairdressers enjoying cutting off peoples hair so much?) She comes up with pretty much what I was thinking about. One of those edgy cuts, short in back, longer in front, lots of layers that have a mind of their own. I LOVE IT!!

So I come home to the boys, a little afraid of Nate's response. He likes it. Doesn't seem TOO excited, but says he likes it. I go in to kiss my little boys goodnight... and here is the priceless responses. I reach over to kiss Toby, and his eyes get HUGE! He gives me a kiss, and just pets my head. It was adorable. No doubt he liked it!

Drew told me it was very pretty, and that I looked like I was part of Barlow Girl. Not sure if there is any greater compliment from my children. I look like I belong in a cool girl band!! I guess I rock... For today at least... I'm sure I'll be the worst mom in the world again tomorrow!

Oh Yeah..photos... can't get one right now... no make up, didn't wash it yet... but check back at Easter photos and I promise you can see this rocking mom!

God is Good!

A First and a Last

We had our community Easter Egg Hunt today! This was Toby's first with us, and we discovered it is Taylor's last. It is for children 10 and under, but we realized, with Easter in April next year, Taylor will actually be 11! She will never be 10 on Easter! Kinda weird!

We were under a fog advisory, and the ground was soaked because of all the snow from last weekend melting! You wouldn't know we had over 12 inches of snow only 7 days ago by looking at these photos! Anyway, rather than a hunt, it was more like a candy pick up. All three of our kids were in different age groups, and they just had the candy scattered on the driveway and parking lot. As usual, it was pretty chaotic, but all in all the kids had a good time.
Toby wanted nothing to do with the Easter Bunny, so mommy had to hold him. Then as we left he turned and said "Bye Bye Easter Bunny!"

Here is Toby happily filling his basket with "tandy". He lasted a few minutes and was done! He was just staring at all the others rushing to get their candy. I know this is terrible, but Nate joked "we can go to Wal Mart anytime and he can stare at the same people!" You get my drift.

After the candy, we came home and Grandpa Carson was putting in our new door, so to keep the kids occupied, we colored eggs. Toby had more fun smashing the eggs on the table than anything. Each kid had 6 eggs, and only 2 of Toby's survived! That wasn't really a problem, though, as all three of my kids love hard boiled eggs. They were all eaten rather quickly!

On another note! Taylor had a soccer game today, and Nate took her and I stayed home with the boys. She called on her way home to tell me she got the winning goal!!! YEAH TAYLOR!! This Soccer Momma is sooo proud!

God is Good!

Finalization Video

Here is a rough draft of the video I have created of our day on Monday. I struggled with music, so forgive me for my choice, but I wanted to get this out there! If any of you have any other suggestions for music, let me know!



God is Good!

Finalization Day!

Well, what a day! I can not express the emotion, joy and happiness that I felt today. We started with lunch at Spaghetti Warehouse with Grandma Derri. The kids did well. And to my surprise, it was kids day, and all meals were only 99cents! (BONUS!) So we got done eating around 1:45 or so, and headed for the courthouse. From the moment we walked in, you could feel the excitement. The security guard knew why we were there, and sent us in the right direction. We then waited for Grandma Debbie and Papaw Rudy.

It was so sweet, the clerk saw us in the hall before hand and knew who we were from our Homestudy. She said it was so sweet reading it and she was so happy for us. Kuddos to our Social Worker!!

There were two other families finalizing, and we were the family in the middle. We were all in the courtroom together, and we first got to go up and confess our desire to adopt Toby. Then we took a photo with the Magistrate. Then we went back up a little later and Toby got to place the official seal on his certificate of adoption. She also let Taylor and Drew stamp a piece of paper to take home. All three kids also got to pound the gavel. They really enjoyed themselves!

Following our time in the courtroom, we headed out to our cars and to the surprise we had for the kids to celebrate the day! We took the kids to Build-A-Bear! They had so much fun. This was Toby's first experience there! He was a champ! Taylor said it was awesome! We finished up with some cookies at the cookie shop and headed home. We are all very tired from a busy day (without naps) and I must get the kids to bed (as Nate is at his basketball game).

And here are a few photos! You can see more at the Photobucket Link (view all images). I will hopefully do a quick video later tonight, once the kids are in bed! It was an indescribable day! God is SOOOOO GOOD!!!

Let it snow

Well, this is what we woke up to! This is the back door, to our patio...
And here is poor Samson, going potty on the patio because he doesn't want to go any further! Poor doggie!
And they are calling for about 8-9 more inches today!

My BIG Boy!

Okay, so Toby went in the potty three times yesterday!! YEAH!! And he's gone once today! I just had to share about my big boy! I am totally letting it happen on his terms. I ask him often if he has to go, but I don't push him. Recently he has had an interest in gum, so that is our treat! Maybe that will be the trick. Who knows how long this will take, but at least it's a pretty good day!

Also, this morning he had an evaluation for his Early Intervention preschool. I can't imagine sending him to preschool yet. I think it will break my heart. Nate took him, and things went well, but we won't know anything for a few weeks.

He's just growing up too darn fast!

On another note, another snow storm. School is releasing early, everything is canceled for the entire weekend... Including Taylor's winter retreat for church. She is going to be sad. I just hope that whenever it is they reschedule it, that she will be able to go! She had so much fun last year.

God is Good!

Kinda sad... Yet so Exciting!

So our last social worker visit was last night! It was a crazy night. I wasn't thinking about election day, so we had to fit that in. I also have been watching a baby this week, which means I get nothing done around the house!! So I walked in the door, dinner in hand, 5 minutes before Kim arrived!! I joked with Kim that you could tell it was our last visit. The first visit you spend hours cleaning the house, the last visit, she's lucky she has a chair cleaned off of toys to sit on!!

While it is so exciting to be close to the finish line with all the paperwork, visits, financial obligations, etc. with the adoption, it is also sad! This roller coaster we have been on for over two years has been all consuming! The highs have been to the moon! The lows have been some of the lowest! I wouldn't change a moment of it! I still get choked up thinking about how Gracious God has been to us through this process. We are not rich, but He provided! I am not patient, but He helped me endure lots of waiting. Transition can be very difficult, but He prepared us all! Our son was sick, but God has made him healthy! We were afraid, but God comforted us! I am not the best mom in the world, but God reminded me that "with God, all things are possible" (Matt 19:26). I could go on and on... but mostly I want to say that God is Good. When we chose Toby's name, I had simply heard it on a TV show and thought, "That's nice, and not over used!" but when I searched to find the meaning of the name, and it came up that Tobias means God is Good! I knew we had found it! What other way to express our gratitude, than to name our son in such a way!

So as we close this chapter, this season in our lives, we look forward to what God has for us next. And praise Him for what he has brought us through!

God is Good!

Deuteronomy 10:21 " He is your praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes."

Final Social Worker Visit

Tonight is our final visit with the social worker before finalization next week! It is so darn exciting to be this close to being done with the paperwork and the supervision. We have had one visit a month since Toby's arrival. Granted, our social worker is wonderful, and it has been completely painless. It is just a matter of having to go through all of that, that we will be glad to have it over. No more having to "report" to someone else on how Toby is doing. No more singling him out and setting aside an evening each month for the visits. Drew asked me the other day who his social worker was. I just had to laugh at that. He thinks that is just how it is done!

Now the only question is... when can we start again?!

Plans are coming together for Monday! I was hoping to get some special outfits for the kids, but haven't really found anything. I have Drew and Toby covered, it is Taylor I was struggling with, but I'm sure we'll find something. My mom is coming, my dad is going to try, and Nate's mom and step-dad are coming as well. Taylor and Drew will go to school in the morning and we will pick them up and head straight to lunch and the courthouse from there! Should be a special day!

God is Good!

An Amazing E-Mail

Okay, so I'm an e-mail junkie. I can not tell you how many times a day I check my e-mail. It would probably be embarrassing if I could! Well, this morning was a typical Sunday morning. Toby was the first up at around 7:30, and thankfully he laid in bed with me for about a half hour while I rested a little bit more! (Love the Veggie Tales on Sunday Mornings!) So I got up to get his breakfast before we head out for church, and as I'm getting out the bowls and cereal, I start up the computer!

To my surprise and excitement and any other words like that, I had an e-mail that was in Korean!!! I quickly opened it to find that it is a letter from Toby's Foster Mother, I believe. It is in Koean, so I am trying to find someone to translate it right now. I have a few leads that will translate e-mails, so I'm hoping to have it done in the next day or so!

Clearly, from what I could read in the e-mail, she checks our blog and has watched the videos of Toby's arrival home! Tears just flowing, as I am so excited to have some contact with Toby's first mommy! I have never met this woman (or family) but I can tell you that they are amazing people that I admire beyond words! Toby is an amazing kid, and I know that that is due to his upbringing his first 27 months in their home. I pray often that we can meet someday and I can express to her my gratitude!

As you can see, I added a Babelfish translator to our site! I hope that if she continues to view our blog, she will be able to translate it into Korean (any of you can do this, it's kinda fun to see my words in Korean!) and at least get the gist of what I am writing about! This is not a true translation, but it does give you some idea!

God is Good - Please continue to pray for Toby's first family in Korea!!